Monday, December 15, 2008

My Grace is Sufficient

Well, it's Thursday. Technically, tomorrow is my last day in the office. I will be working on an "as needed" basis next week, which will put me in the office for a couple of hours. Officially, however, I consider tomorrow my last true, full, entire, complete, total work day. Unreal.

This morning, we had the annual Christmas breakfast in the office. Just picture 3 picnic tables covered with plates of cookies, biscuits, casseroles, scrambled eggs, sausage, chocolate...more chocolate...more goes on and on and on and on. Prior to the "chow fest," we have the privilege of hearing a very wonderful and godly employee give a blessing over the Christmas season and the breakfast. I knew today would be tough, but as I stood next to my closest friend at of my closest friends in Raleigh...the tears began to flow.

I stand in awe of the blessings God has provided my two years in Raleigh. I did not understand, at the time, His purpose in bringing me here. I don't know that I will ever fully grasp the wonder and purpose of His divinity and sovereignty, though He absolutely blows me away time and time again. He took me from North Carolina to Colorado to show me His true love and gift of life. He took me from North Carolina to Texas to show me the importance and value of unconditional love through the friendships of several phenomenal women. He took me from Texas to Belize to show me real without the fluff, so to speak. He took me from Texas to France to show me that I really am His...and I really can stand on my own two feet (as long as I have a Hand to hold). He took me from Texas back to NC, but a different place than the town I knew so well. Raleigh, home. 

I questioned, quite often actually, why He took me out of the comfort zone of Texas. Well, I am learning more and more to question Him less and less. The banner over my life reads "My grace is sufficient for today." That is what He pours into my heart, time and time again. In this city, He has brought me the dearest of friends. He has allowed me the joy of spending time with my family that lives less than two hours away. He gave me time with my grandfather prior to his reunion with Jesus. He has blessed me with the unconditional love of an incredible man...a man who has stood by me in some very dark seasons of life and, still, loves me where I am...regardless of where I'm been or where I'm going. And, ultimately, He brought me into a community of believers, without whom I'm not sure I could put one foot in front of the other. The people surrounding me have pointed me Upwards when my heart was pulling me down. 

And now? Now these people are pushing me towards a goal I have had for some education at the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill. I received my letter...they did not say yes...but they did not say no! I have a happy and content place on the wait list until February 9th. Even if the letter says "No" on that day, I will frame it with pride, as God continues to open and close doors around me. That will be my framed matter what the answer!

So for now, I will live under the same billboard and banner I'm seeing more clearly each day: "My grace is sufficient."

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